Category Archives: Awkward

Excuse me, who are you again?

So, when I eventually calmed down from the utter and complete RAGE I was feeling in regards to the incompetent, unprofessional, and irresponsible administrator that stood ME UP in the interview that I attempted to attend yesterday, I got to thinking about all of the other ridiculous interview that I have experienced, and the ridiculous interviews that my friends have experienced.

Situation 1

Again, I venture to an interview. Again, I sit in traffic.  This particular Principal asked me to meet her at a coffee shop in downtown Brooklyn. Fine, no sweat.

I get to the interview.

Principal Z asks me, “So you taught at Elementary School 100?”

UHHHHHHHH NO.

I look at the resume that she’s holding in front of her hands…

GUESS WHAT….

IT. IS. NOT. MINE.

She looks at me…Ummmm what’s your last name again?

I tell her.

Ummmmm, do you have a copy of your resume?

Yeah, sure…here you go.

I MEAN REALLY PEOPLE?? Is it too much to ask for the person who is interviewing you to actually HAVE YOUR RESUME? For them to DO some HOMEWORK?

Sheesh.

xo

Ms. Sub

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Filed under Administrators, Awkward, Education, Incompetence

Hoochie coochie junderwear!

Hello Friends!

Ok, so yes, it is summer.  But unfortunately, the junderwears are still rampant.  Which, got me thinking about the dress code issues that SHOULD be in place at the schools that I have seen about, worked in, etcetera.  My fellow co-workers and I were discussing this as of late, and we remember when we were in school, and there was a dress code that was inforced.  We did not go to a parochial school, (there were no uniforms in our educational past).  We are public school children through and through, and proud of it! We went to a wonderful high school, and had an amazing education.  That being said, if we chose to wear something inappropriate, (lets say junderwear for example), and we managed to get past the watchful eyes of our parents, or we were slick enough to change in the bathroom at school, the administration made us change into our physical education clothes.  Our shorts could not come above the tips of our fingers when our hands were at our sides, and our shirts could have nothing inappropriate about hem as well.  I for one think that this should be reinforced.  I look at some of these kids sometimes and it makes ME uncomfortable, I cannot even IMAGINE what my male co-workers are feeling!

I’m curious to know what you all think!

xo

Ms. Sub

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Filed under Awkward, Education, Perspective, Teenagers, the future

THE NOTE

It’s been awhile since I’ve trotted down memory lane, so here it goes…

It was a Friday.  I believe the month was May.  I had been subbing for a middle school social studies teacher for the entire week.  He had both seventh and eighth grade classes.  The eighth graders were in the morning, which was nice.  After the “pleasant” eighth graders were done, it was smooth sailing.  May I refer you back to the post, Micky Mouse is Dead, to remind you the type of children I was dealing with.  Anyway, back to the story.

The girls, scantily clad in clothing that made ME feel like I was in some sort of nightclub, were drooling over a little boy in the class.  One in particular grabbed his attention so much, that they were passing a note back and forth and back and forth.  Finally, when the eye glaring did not do anything to dissuade them from passing the note, I simply said, put it away or I’m taking it. Case closed.  A mere thirty seconds later, the little girl asked me if she could go to the restroom.  I simply wrote her a pass and then she left.  She was barely out of the classroom when her little counterpart asked if he too could go to the bathroom.  I looked at him as if he had ten heads and said sure, when “little girl” gets back.

Fast forward to ninth period…a seventh grade class….

A truly cherubic little blonde girl, (I am very sincere in that remark, she was one of the sweetest students I ever had), raises her hand and said, “Ummm Ms. Sub, I think you need to see this.”

I walked over, and recognized the note that she had in her hands. The lovely little boy and girl duo left their note behind.

I wasn’t going to read it, I swear, but the words F*CK just leaped off of the page.  And, it was my civil responsiblity to do so for pete’s sake, right?  I mean THEY ARE CHILDREN.  You’re 12 and 13 when you’re in eighth grade!!!

I began to read….and I let out a yelp.

They were discussing how they wanted to “go f*ck”.  “GO F*CK”.  ARE THEY OUT OF THEIR MINDS?!?!?!?!?!??!?!

And, what’s more is that they TRIED TO GO TO THE BATHROOM TO DO IT.

OH YES, little girl addressed it in the note!

“I thought we were going to go f*ck in the BATHROOM”

Little boy tells her, “I tried, and failed”.

CAN YOU IMAGINE WHAT WOULD’VE HAPPENED IF I LET THEM BOTH GO?

Oh. My. GOD.

Naturally, I gave it to their teacher, who gave it to the assistant principal, who called both of their parents.  It was like hot potato with a note.

Did they necessarily do anything wrong? NO.

But being that they were going to attempt another little rendezvous over the weekend at a sporting event, well, I thought the parents should know.

Children scare me sometimes, they really do!

Xo

Ms. Sub

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Filed under Awkward, Education, Perspective, the future

Dictator Genitalia

A friend of mine who teaches a social studies extra help class told us this little bit.

She asked her students, “What do Hitler, Mussolini, and Stalin have in common?”

They replied, “A penis.”

Thank you for the clarification gentlemen, as if we were confused.

 

Until next time my friends!

xo Ms. Sub

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Junderwear

jun·der·wear

[jun-der-wair]

– noun

Jean shorts that are popular with young females, but they are so short that they should be sold as underwear, not shorts. Please see photo below.

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Filed under Awkward, the future

T.M.I.K ~ TOO MUCH INFORMATION KIDS!

Courtesy of Ms. Lynne….

Grade level: 8th

Subject matter: English

Assignment given: Read story out of textbook. Answer questions.

Piece of cake, yes?

WELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

After Ms. Lynne gives the assignment and walks back to her desk….one of the boys immediately raises his hand.

“Ummmmm Ms. Lynne, I think I need a new book.”

Ms. Lynne walks over to the book, sees that it has been defaced with a variety of genital drawings, and gives the student a new book.  As she is walking away from the desk, the student says,” I don’t understand why people always draw b@lls with hair on them….mine have none.”

I do believe Ms. Lynne just gained some more gray hair.

TELL ME FRIENDS, HOW WOULD YOU REACT TO THAT???

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BOOBS.

Sometimes, a picture says a thousand words.

AND THEN SOME.

Courtesy of Ms. K….

Notice the diagram next to the writing...lovely kids, lovely.

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Filed under ARTWORK, Awkward