Time: 2 years ago.
Class: Ninth grade spanish
Student A: So, um, do you like want to be a real teacher one day?
Me: Excuse me? I AM a real teacher.
Student A: No I mean, not like a substitute. Like, a REAL teacher.
Me: Substitutes ARE real teachers. Nobody goes to school to be a SUBSTITUTE!!!!
Later on, the same day…
Class: Self-Contained Mathematics
Student A is shooting the stapler at Student B.
Student C, while dangling a bottle of Purel over my head: Wouldn’t it be funny if this got all over your hair?
Me: No, no it wouldn’t. SIT DOWN NOW. Now, we have to do the work that Mr. N left for you.
Entire Class: We don’t fucking do work. There’s a sub. DUH…
And that was just the beginning…