MOON.

A student mooned my colleague and I today.

Where’s the parent accountability for THAT?

(Cause when the principal called, the phone call was screened and ignored.)

xo

Ms. Sub

P.S. Do us a favor and support our friends over at The Write Teacher, and LIKE  their facbeook page. Click here.

MS. MIERDA

Hello beautiful people,

I had an interesting subbing assignment this week, I had to cover middle school ESL classes.

Teaching middle school is hard enough.

SUBBING middle school is even harder.

ESL AT THE MIDDLE SCHOOL LEVEL????? Well, it’s just cruel.

I actually started the day off bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.  Work was going well these week, I was even HAPPY to have an extra school assignment, eager to tackle the day. It was first period, and I was writing my name on the board.  The students were being typical pre-pubescent teenagers, and pretending not to notice or understand that I was attempting to start class.

Finally, I got their attention.

I introduced myself.

They asked me what my name was.

I introduced myself again.

They continued to say things to me, many of them yelling in Spanish and English.

Then, one of the students, we’ll call him Mark, who was sitting in the front row, said:

“Her name is Ms. Mierda.”

MIERDA.

For those of you who still need a translation, MIERDA is the word for SH*T in Spanish.

Yes, you got that right….I was called MS. SH*T by a twelve-year-old at 7:30 am.

What a way to start the day.

xo

Ms. Sub

A Tales of Substitution NOTICE

Hello Beautiful People,

The past few weeks have been rather chaotic.  Yes, I do have that part-time teaching gig. Yes, I am pursuing a variety of writing and arts related projects, and yes, I am still subbing.  As most of you already know, I’m subbing in a different district. A mere two days a week here at there. I subbed today. And my brain is now mush, it is now scrambled eggs, it is, mierda. For those of you who need a translation on mierda, well, I will address that in the next post, (tomorrow). Hopefully bt then, my brain cells will be restored to normal. Hopefully.  I’m also in the process of transferring this blog to tumblr. (I think.)  Any feedback on that will be GREATLY appreciated.

Until then…in the act of shameless self promotion, do be sure to check out “The Write Teacher”, it is more…positive than this rant.

Stay well my friends, stay well.

xo

Ms. Sub 

 

Share the stress….

Hello Beautiful People,

I will keep this short and sweet, so here it goes.

We are interested in sharing your substitute teacher stories! Inquire within about contributions, we’d love to hear from you!

xo

Ms. Sub

The week from hell has a new meaning…

Hello Beautiful People,

I promised I’d update you on the horrendous week I had, and, well, here goes it. As many of you know, I had a student light a pencil on fire.  If this does not ring a bell with you, please refer to our FIRE entry. IN ADDITION to children lighting objects on fire for no apparent reason, I had a student call me a “stupid b##ch” on Monday, and, on Wednesday, I was told, “f%$k you”.

Isn’t that NICE?

AREN’T THEY CHERUBIC?

I’m not going to sit here and rant about my students, that is not my attention.  Children will always lash out, that’s why they’re CHILDREN.

I WILL rant about the reaction that I got from my co-workers:

“Oh, he always calls me that.”

“Oh, he says that all the time.”

“I mean, it’s an “alternative” program, what do you expect?”

WHAT DO I EXPECT?!?!?!?!??!?!?!!?

I’ll tell you what I expect. I expect us to teach them what their parents apparently didn’t.  I expect us to teach them the RIGHT WAY TO TALK TO PEOPLE.  I expect us, to at LEAST TRY to right the wrongs here. That’s what I expect.  I don’t care if I’m teaching in an alternative school, regular school, college…I don’t care if they’re receiving their education in JAIL.  I expect us to educate, and to teach right from wrong.  That’s what I expect, and that is what I will do, despite the eye-rolling I get from those around me.  They’ll ask me why I bother…and do you KNOW WHAT MY RESPONSE WILL BE?

……..because I’m a teacher. 

xo

Ms. Sub

@#$%…@!!…%^#$…

Hello Beautiful People,

Does the title of this post make ANY SENSE? No, not at all. Actually…I guess it makes sense in my head, but I’m too filled with disgust and rage and frustration to even begin to let my fingers do the talking, or typing, or whatever you’d like to call it.

THEREFORE…

I will update you on the Tales of Substitution, TOMORROW.

After I’ve calmed down.

And in the interest of helping fellow writers and friends and projects…doe be sure to LIKE The Write Teacher on Facebook. It’s much more calm than Tales of Subs.

xo

Ms. Sub

FIRE.

Hello Beautiful People…

Just when you think life couldn’t get any more insane…IT DOES, right? Well, just when you think students couldn’t get any more out of control, well, THEY DO!  Allow me to paint the picture for you:

Time: 3:30.

Class: Creative writing

What the students are ACTUALLY supposed to be doing: Listening to an audiobook and following along, while taking notes in their journals.

What the students are REALLY doing: Sleeping, complaining, one was actually following the rules, and, the last one, well, THIS STUDENT DECIDED TO LIGHT THEIR PENCIL ON FIRE AND THROW IT OUT OF THE WINDOW.

NO, I’m not making this up.

Yes, it really happened.

HOW did this happen?  Well, like the old saying goes, I turned my head FOR A SECOND, to print out make up work for ANOTHER STUDENT, and, Student Fire decided to whip out a lighter and see what flame does to a pencil.

Naturally, I bugged out.

As I was going to alert my superior, Student Fire wanted to know why I had to go “tell on him”.

Like, really kid?

YOU’RE EIGHTEEN AND YOU THOUGHT THAT IT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA TO LIGHT A PENCIL ON FIRE? WHAT HAPPENED IN YOUR BRAIN THAT MADE YOU THINK THIS WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA? HM????????

So yes, Student Fire, as the responsible adult in the room, I’m going to go “tell on you”. But first, we’re all going to sit here in silence, while you find the words to explain your actions.

 

XO

Ms. Sub